Do People Pleasers Have Anxiety? A Salt Lake City Therapist Explains

Many women in Salt Lake City who struggle with anxiety also recognize themselves in people-pleasing patterns. If you often prioritize other people’s needs, worry about disappointing others, or go out of your way to avoid conflict, it can slowly start to wear on you. The constant pressure to keep everyone happy and the fear of upsetting someone can create a lot of internal stress and overthinking. The good news is that these patterns can be understood and worked through. Through anxiety therapy in Salt Lake City, many women begin to understand why people-pleasing developed in the first place and how it connects to the anxiety they feel every day.

Reasons Why People-Pleasers Experience Anxiety

Fear of rejection

First, there's the fear of rejection. People pleasers have a genuine dread of being disliked or rejected by others. Part of this can be their temperament and personality, and another part of this might be past experiences contributing to the fear of rejection. They'll go to great lengths to avoid any sort of disagreement or conflict, fearing that if they stand up for themselves or express their own needs, they'll face rejection or disapproval. It's a heavy burden to carry, and it fuels their anxiety.

Perfectionism

Then, there's the issue of perfectionism. People pleasers tend to hold themselves to incredibly high standards and strive for perfection in everything they do. Oftentimes, they may not realize they are experiencing perfectionistic tendencies and might not recognize it’s a problem. The constant worry about making mistakes or falling short of others' expectations only ramps up their stress and anxiety levels.

Overcommitment

Overcommitment is another reason people-pleasers experience anxiety. People pleasers often take on way more responsibilities and obligations than they can handle. They struggle to say "no" when asked for help or to set proper boundaries, which ends up overwhelming them and causing even more anxiety as they try to keep up with everyone's expectations. It’s easy to feel resentful when you are spread thin and are saying yes to things you don’t have the emotional capacity for. 

Lack of self-care

Lack of self-care is a problem among people-pleasers. People pleasers are notorious for putting everyone else's needs before their own. They may see more value in taking care of other people and don’t see a need to focus on themselves.  Neglecting self-care and personal well-being can lead to exhaustion, burnout, and a significant increase in anxiety levels.

Struggle with assertiveness

Last but not least, asserting themselves can be a real challenge for people pleasers. They often find it difficult to communicate their own needs and desires assertively. This internal conflict between wanting to please others and taking care of themselves creates tension and anxiety.

Anxiety Therapy in Salt Lake City, Utah, helps with people-pleasing anxiety

Anxiety therapy, also known as anxiety counseling, can be a game-changer for people-pleasers.  Anxiety therapy creates a safe and supportive space for you to dive into the issues that may be part of your people-pleasing tendencies and work through other anxiety symptoms.  Through anxiety treatment, you can understand yourself better and have better coping skills for anxiety, where you don’t constantly neglect yourself to care for others. With the support of an anxiety therapist, you can understand yourself better, stop people-pleasing so much, and feel better about yourself. 

How to Start Working with an Anxiety Therapist in Salt Lake City, Utah

You can stop focusing on everyone else at your own expense. You can let go of people-pleasing, and anxiety therapy can help. This Utah Counseling Clinic has an anxiety therapist who helps people-pleasers. To begin anxiety treatment, follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with a therapist for anxiety

  3. Start overcoming people-pleasing

Frequently Asked Questions About People-Pleasing and Anxiety

Is people-pleasing a sign of anxiety?

It can be. Many people-pleasing behaviors are driven by anxiety about rejection, conflict, or disappointing others. When someone feels responsible for keeping everyone else comfortable or happy, it can create constant overthinking, stress, and self-doubt.

Why do people with anxiety become people pleasers?

People-pleasing often develops as a way to avoid conflict or criticism. If someone feels anxious about upsetting others or being judged, saying “yes,” staying agreeable, and prioritizing other people’s needs can feel safer in the moment, even though it can become exhausting over time.

How do I stop people-pleasing when I have anxiety?

Changing people-pleasing patterns usually starts with understanding why the behavior developed. Therapy can help you recognize the anxiety underneath people-pleasing, learn to tolerate discomfort around boundaries, and practice expressing your needs without feeling overwhelming guilt.

Can therapy help with people-pleasing and anxiety?

Yes. Many people find that therapy helps them understand the deeper emotional patterns behind people-pleasing, such as fear of rejection, perfectionism, or feeling responsible for others’ emotions. Over time, this can help reduce anxiety and make it easier to set boundaries.

Can I get anxiety therapy if I live in Salt Lake City?

Yes. If you live in Salt Lake City or anywhere in Utah, you can work with me through online sessions. Anxiety therapy can help you understand the connection between anxiety and people-pleasing while learning new ways to handle overthinking, boundaries, and the pressure to keep everyone happy.

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt, LCSW, is a dedicated anxiety therapist specializing in working with women. She holds a bachelor's degree in Psychology and a bachelor's degree in Family Life and Human Development from Southern Utah University in Cedar City, Utah. With a strong passion for supporting others, Ashlee further pursued her education and earned a Master's degree in Social Work from Utah State University in Logan, Utah. With her expertise and specialized focus on anxiety, Ashlee brings a compassionate and knowledgeable approach to her work, providing valuable support and guidance to women seeking relief from anxiety.

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Understanding People Pleasing: A Guide for Women in Salt Lake City

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How Does People-Pleasing Affect Your Mental Health? Insights from a Salt Lake City Anxiety Therapist