4 Reasons to Ditch the Scale: Advice from an Eating Disorder Therapist in Utah 

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A common behavior my clients have been using before they come to therapy is weighing themselves. The frequency is different for everyone but it impacts the women I see the same way: the scale makes my clients obsessive, and they feel terrible about themselves. Weighing yourself can do more damage than it can be helpful. 

Should people with eating disorders have scales?

No, they shouldn’t. In fact, even after they have recovered from an eating disorder they don’t benefit from having a scale. The scale tends to be a triggering thing for women even without eating disorders. It tends to reinforce the need for control and disordered eating. I also recommend that other people in the house don’t have scales either because trust me the person with an eating disorder will find it. Usually, it’s when they are feeling the lowest and are looking for some reassurance, and that in and of itself is harmful. 

Do scales cause eating disorders? 

Eating disorders are complex and complicated mental health issues and no single thing causes an eating disorder. Obsessively weighing yourself is a disordered behavior and can contribute to a development of an eating disorder. The value placed on the number on the scale can fuel eating disorder behaviors such as restriction, overexercise, and purging. It doesn’t seem to matter how low the scale can go, it’s never enough for people that struggle with eating disorders. The scale only makes eating disorders worse. 

Why you shouldn’t weigh yourself every day?

A woman standing on a scale looking at her body in a mirror. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women improve body image issues by providing therapy for body image issues in Utah.

There are many reasons why you shouldn’t weigh yourself every day. Here are some of the common reasons why you shouldn’t: 

  1. Daily fluctuations: Even if you are attempting to use the scale as a measurement tool, there are so many daily fluctuations such as hydration, stress, digestion, your menstrual cycle, and hormonal changes that will change your weight daily. 

  2. Obsessive behaviors: Checking the scale daily can lead to more obsessive behaviors with eating and exercise. The number on the scale can lead to feeling anxiety and low self-esteem

  3. Inaccurate measurement: The scale is not an accurate measurement tool when it comes to different times of the day, what you are wearing, hydration, and digestion. 

  4. Focus on weight over health: Many people indicate they are focusing on their weight because they want to be healthy when oftentimes they are hoping to be thin and improve their body image. Weighing yourself reinforces that this is the most important indicator of health when it’s not. 

What happens if you weigh yourself too much?

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Sadly, there is nothing good that comes from weighing yourself often. It is damaging to your mental health and often leads to problems with physical health when it triggers disordered eating behaviors and eating disorder symptoms. People that weigh themselves frequently have obsessive thoughts and higher rates of anxiety and depression. You are more prone to body image issues and unhealthy relationships with exercise. 

Reasons why you should ditch the scale and stop weighing yourself 

These are not the only reasons to give up on weighing yourself. These are some of the common reasons why you should ditch the scale:

  1. The scale makes body image issues worse 

Weighing yourself frequently puts an overemphasis on your body and can result in negative body image. The number on the scale can cause shame about yourself and your appearance. It can lead to seeking reassurance and using compulsive behaviors to make sure you’re ok. People believe that weight loss will cure their body image issues when it only makes them think about their body image more frequently than before. 

2. Weighing yourself creates an unhealthy relationship with exercise

When your mood and self-worth are dependent upon a number on the scale, you are more likely to engage in disordered exercise behaviors in order to try and lose weight. Exercise becomes less about a health-promoting behavior and becomes more about a means to manipulate and change your body size. 

3. Frequent weighing yourself can increase anxiety and depression 

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Weighing yourself frequently leads to worry, stress, and anxiety about your weight. Not reaching your weight goals leads to self-criticism, negative self-talk, and overall a more depressed mood. Focusing on the number on the scale can reinforce unrealistic expectations about body image, and weight loss. 

4. Focusing on weight leads to more disordered eating 

Constantly checking and looking at the number on the scale reinforces restrictive behaviors such as skipping meals, counting calories, and cutting out food groups. Restriction results in binge eating behaviors both of which impact the number on the scale. This all leads to a disordered eating cycle. 

Eating disorder therapy in Utah can help improve disordered eating 

Eating disorder therapy can help you see yourself beyond the number on the scale. Therapy focuses on challenging the negative beliefs you have about yourself and your body. You can learn to change the way you talk to yourself and use more self-compassion. Eating disorder counseling can help you understand how past experiences have contributed to the overemphasis on appearance and body size. Therapy can be a safe and non-judgmental place for you to be open and discuss what you are struggling with and find new ways of coping. 

Start working with an eating disorder therapist in Utah 

A woman holding her arms out. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women find freedom from their eating disorders by providing disordered eating therapy in Utah.

You don’t have to stay stuck in your relationship with food and your body. You can find freedom from the scale and peace in your relationship with your body. Eating disorder therapy can help. This Utah Counseling Center has an eating disorder therapist specializing in eating disorder therapy. To begin counseling follow the steps below:

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation

  2. Meet with a therapist for eating disorders

  3. Bergin eating disorder recovery

Online Eating Disorder Therapy in Utah

It can be hard to make time in your schedule to travel to meet with an eating disorder therapist. It also might be hard to find an eating disorder therapist in your town that has the specialized training to know how to help. This is why I provide online therapy in Utah. Online eating disorder therapy is just as effective as in-person therapy but saves you time and can be done from the comfort of your own home.

Online counseling also means I work with clients all over Utah. I work with clients in Provo, Logan, St. George, Salt Lake City, Heber City, Cedar City, St. George, and more.

Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy 

Eating disorder therapy isn’t the only mental health service provided by this Utah Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include binge eating disorder treatment, body image therapy, therapy for birth trauma, counseling for college students, anxiety therapy, and EMDR therapy. Reach out for a 15-minute phone consultation to see how I can help.

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt, therapist for eating disorders in Utah. Maple Canyon Therapy offers therapy for anxiety in Utah.

Ashlee Hunt is an eating disorder therapist and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy near Provo, Utah. Ashlee has a master’s degree in social work from Utah State University. She has two bachelor’s degrees: psychology and family life and human development from Southern Utah University. Ashlee has worked with women with eating disorders since 2013 when she interned at USU Counseling and psychological services. Ashlee loves helping women improve their relationship with food and their bodies.

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An Anxiety Therapist in Utah Offers 3 Grounding Tips 

A woman outside doing yoga. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women cope with anxiety by providing help for dating anxiety in Utah.

Your heart is racing. You’re breathing fast. You have that sick feeling in your stomach. You know you’re feeling overwhelmed with anxiety. You hate when you start feeling this way and you don’t know how to stop it or change it. 

Managing the symptoms of anxiety is overwhelming. It can be hard to know how to calm down, especially at the moment when you’re dealing with anxiousness. You don’t have to feel overtaken by anxiety and fear. Grounding skills can help you learn to cope with anxiety, and anxiety therapy can help.

Do grounding techniques really work for anxiety?

It’s hard to know if all the talk about grounding skills is actually effective or if it’s hokey pokey without any actual real evidence that it works for anxiety. When you are feeling anxious, the sympathetic nervous system kicks in with the “fight or flight” response. It doesn’t matter if you are in danger or not, your brain doesn’t know for sure and responds as if you are in danger and need to deal with a threat. This is when your body responds to those annoying anxiety symptoms. Grounding techniques are effective and activate what is known as the parasympathetic nervous system. This helps the body rest and calm itself. Grounding skills reduce your heart rate, lower your blood pressure, and other physical symptoms to help your body calm. 

What are anxiety symptoms?

When the sympathetic nervous system is activated, it will have a direct impact on the body. These are some of the common anxiety symptoms: 

  • Racing heart

  • Shallow and rapid breathing

  • Muscle tension and tightness

  • Sweaty and clammy

  • Nausea or butterflies 

  • Irritability or feeling on edge

  • Difficulty controlling worried thoughts 

  • Insomnia or difficulty sleeping 

  • Loss of focus or trouble concentrating 

How often to practice grounding tips for anxiety?

This depends on the individual and their specific anxiety struggles but I can confidently say if everyone practiced grounding skills for anxiety on a daily basis they’d be doing better than not practicing them at all. Grounding skills will become easier and more natural when anxiety shows up if you are practicing them even when your anxiety is not at an all-time high. You could practice them multiple times per day and be doing even better. Practicing and implementing grounding skills when dealing with anxiety will become a coping skill that comes on automatically when anxiety starts to rise. It’s important to note practicing anxiety skills alone isn’t the only approach to anxiety management. Working with an anxiety therapist is recommended too. 

Grounding tips to try from an Anxiety Therapist 

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There are many grounding skills you can implement and practice. It’s important that you find grounding skills that you enjoy and find helpful. Not all grounding skills will be the ones you like to use. Here are some of the grounding skills for anxiety to try. 

Deep breathing

This is one of the most powerful ways to calm and soothe your nervous system when you are feeling anxious. Deep breathing will activate the body’s response to relaxation by slowing down your heart rate and increasing oxygen flow to the blood. You can practice deep breathing by finding a comfortable place to sit or lie down. Practice breathing in deeply through your nose for five seconds and holding for 5 and letting out a deep exhale for 5 seconds. You can practice this skill at any time such as at a job interview, a school presentation, or in a confrontation or conflict with a loved one. The more you practice deep breathing the sooner your brain will start to associate this as a way of coping when anxiety hits. 

5 senses technique 

There are different ways of doing this exercise. You essentially go through all five of your senses and notice 5 things. You would notice 5 things you see. 4 things you can touch or feel. 3 things you can hear. 2 things you smell. 1 thing you can taste. For people that are feeling extra activated, I recommend then focus on finding 5 of each. You might not be able to find 5 things you can smell or taste but it can draw your focus and attention to being really mindful. The purpose of this exercise is to help you ground yourself in the present moment. Anxiety is activated when you start thinking of future scenarios or thinking about the past. When you focus on and remain in the present moment it can decrease anxiety. 

Safe Calm Place Visualization 

This might be one of my favorite grounding skills but it doesn’t mean it has to be yours. I recommend doing this before you are activated and anxious. Come up with a place or experience you’ve had in the past that makes you feel calm and safe. If you don’t have a place you’ve been, you can imagine a place that you would like to go that you envision makes you feel calm, safe, and relaxed. You can look up photos of places so that you can have a visual in mind. Bring to mind this place and slow down your breathing. Notice how it makes your body feel. Focus on the pleasant sensations you feel. Notice the things you see, hear, smell, and feel. What’s the temperature like? Keep breathing in deeply. Give this place a name so that when you think of the name it can cue up a calming and relaxing response. 

Anxiety therapy in Utah can help

The purpose of therapy for anxiety is to help you to understand your anxiety better. You can learn the things that trigger and increase your anxiety as well as how to cope with them. Anxiety is sometimes a symptom of something that happened in the past that you might not recognize as connected. Working with a therapist for anxiety can help you work through these areas. Working on your anxiety in a supportive and safe environment can help you feel comfortable addressing the areas of your life impacted by anxiety. An important part of healing is being able to have connection and support and anxiety therapy can help you get that. 

Start working with a therapist for anxiety in Utah

A couch with pillows and a basket. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides EMDR Therapy in Utah County.

You don’t have to keep dealing with anxiety all on your own. You can find relief from feeling anxious. Therapy for anxiety can help! This Utah Counseling Center has an therapist for anxiety specializing in anxiety therapy. To sign up for anxiety counseling follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with an anxiety therapist 

  3. Begin working on your anxiety 

Online Therapy in Utah 

I know it can be hard to find time in your schedule to attend another appointment. It can also be scary to think about finding an office for your therapy appointment when you are feeling anxious. This is why I provide online therapy in Utah. It’s safe, effective, and can be done from the comfort of your own. It’s equally as effective and helpful as in-person therapy but is much more convenient. 

Online counseling also means I can work with you wherever you are located in Utah. I work with clients in Cedar City, St. George, Provo, Heber City, Salt Lake City, Logan, and more. 

Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon  Therapy 

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only counseling service provided at this Utah Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include EMDR therapy, body image therapy, eating disorder therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, therapy for college students, and birth trauma therapy. Schedule a free phone consultation to see how I can help. 

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt LCSW. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides disordered eating therapy in Utah.

Ashlee Hunt LCSW  is an anxiety therapist and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy near Provo, Utah. She has a bachelor of science in psychology and a bachelor of science in family life and human development from Southern Utah University. Ashlee has a master’s degree in social work from Utah State University. She loves helping women learn to cope with anxiety by using techniques that focus on past experiences as well as effective coping skills. Ashlee believes that anxiety doesn’t have to ruin your life but you can learn to understand it and deal with it better

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What is Toxic Perfectionism?

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You may have heard the word toxic perfectionism thrown around or this is your first time hearing about it. You might wonder if it’s any different than regular perfectionism and what does toxic perfectionism entail? Perfectionism involves aiming for high standards, achievement, and excellence. If you are a perfectionist you might be motivated to do well in work, school, and in your relationships. You want to be successful in many parts of your life. So when does it turn toxic? Honestly, I haven’t met a balanced perfectionist because as humans we aren’t mentally and emotionally equipped to obtain perfection constantly. However, let's explore more about the term toxic perfectionism and how anxiety therapy can help.

What is toxic perfectionism?

Toxic perfectionism is a mindset that is rigid on holding yourself or others to unrealistically high standards. These high standards are not attainable and result in burnout and strained relationships. It is common that these perfectionists to be angry and disappointed when they don’t achieve their goals. Toxic perfectionists will take a hit on their self-esteem when they are unable to achieve the goals or expectations they have for themselves. They may also become overly critical of themselves or others. Like perfectionists, toxic perfectionism can be focused on people pleasing at their own expense. As a result, these perfectionists experience symptoms of anxiety and depression. Toxic perfectionism disregards the effort and growth that might occur trying to achieve goals because of the intense focus on a perfect outcome. 

What are the symptoms of toxic perfectionism?

Not everyone that experiences toxic perfectionism will have all of the listed symptoms. These are just some of the common symptoms of toxic perfectionism: 

  • Unrealistic standards

  • Fear of failure

  • Critical of self and others

  • Need for control

  • Procrastination 

  • Rigidity

  • Somatic symptoms 

  • Interpersonal relationship difficulties

  • Anxiety

  • Depression

  • Insomnia or trouble sleeping

  • Imposter syndrome 

What causes toxic perfectionism?

There’s never a simple answer to complex issues such as toxic perfectionism. Toxic perfectionism can be influenced by so many factors. Here are some common factors to consider: 

  1. Genetics 

There is research suggesting that genetic factors can contribute to the development of perfectionistic tendencies. There’s so much we still don’t know about genes and how it relates to perfectionism but at this point, we know there is some relationship. 

2. Parenting and childhood experiences

Being raised by perfectionistic parents or parents who have high expectations can lead to toxic perfectionism. When there is a strong emphasis on achievement and success in a family, this influences perfectionistic behaviors. 

3. Trauma 

Those who have experienced trauma may have learned to cope using perfectionistic behaviors. Those who have been through trauma may have learned that they experienced less emotional or physical abuse when they were successful. 

4. Personality traits

Certain personality traits may be more prone to become toxic perfectionists. Personality traits such as high conscientiousness, neuroticism, need for control, high standards, and OCD traits. 

How to stop toxic perfectionism?

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Being able to stop toxic perfectionism is no small task and requires a lot of support including the help of a mental health professional. Being able to overcome toxic perfectionism involves practicing self-compassion, learning to cope with anxiety, and challenging the negative beliefs you have about yourself. To be successful in letting go of toxic perfectionism long term, addressing underlying trauma and learning to manage underlying mental health issues is critical. Overcoming toxic perfectionism takes time and patience. It doesn’t happen overnight because it didn’t develop overnight. You probably have more experience with using perfectionistic behaviors than you haven’t. 

What are the signs of perfectionism?

Perfectionism is highly individual and unique to each person. These are common signs of perfectionism: 

  1. Setting extremely high standards for oneself or others. 

  2. Procrastination. Perfectionists procrastinate for fear that they can’t achieve a goal or complete a task to their high standards. 

  3. Overthinking. Perfectionists tend to overthink or overanalyze situations. 

  4. Focus on outcomes and achievement. Perfectionists focus on achieving their standards rather than growth and learning. 

  5. Black and white thinking: Perfectionists tend to think of things in extremes and don’t see a middle ground. 

  6. Control. Perfectionists have a need to feel in control of situations, people, and emotions. 

  7. Self-critical. Perfectionists can utilize negative self-talk, and blame, and are overly hard on themselves. 

Overcoming Perfectionism

The first step to overcoming toxic perfectionism is to notice when you are setting impossible standards for yourself. Think about the areas in your life where perfectionism causes stress—maybe at work, in school, or even in personal projects. Ask yourself if your expectations are realistic or if they are setting you up to feel like a failure. Try adjusting them to be more reasonable, allowing space for mistakes and learning. When you accept that nobody is perfect, it takes away some of the pressure and helps you feel less anxious.

Being kind to yourself is also an important part of overcoming perfectionism. If a friend made a mistake, you wouldn’t tell them they weren’t good enough—so why say that to yourself? When you feel like you’ve failed or didn’t do something perfectly, remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes, and that’s okay. Practicing mindfulness, like taking deep breaths or focusing on the present moment, can help you stop worrying so much about your flaws. Learning to be more understanding toward yourself will help you break free from toxic perfectionism and feel more confident in your everyday life.

Therapy for perfectionists in Utah can help with toxic perfectionism 

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If you are someone struggling with toxic perfectionism, there’s help for you. You can work through toxic perfectionism in therapy. Therapy can help you learn to understand self-compassion and how to practice it. You can learn to challenge negative self-talk and be able to change and challenge the negative beliefs you have about yourself. You may have learned to use perfectionistic tendencies as a way of coping with trauma or anxiety. Working with a therapist can help you learn to cope in a more healthy and effective way. You can also learn to heal from your trauma and work through the other underlying emotional issues you may have experienced or be experiencing. Therapy may not be easy but it’s worth the effort and impact it will have on your life. You deserve to be seen and understood. You can overcome toxic perfectionism, and promise that therapy is a valuable tool to help. 

Begin therapy for perfectionism near Provo, Utah

You don’t have to stay stuck in a pattern of perfectionism. You can learn to be kind to yourself and not give yourself a hard time when you don’t do as well as you would have liked. This Utah Counseling Clinic has a compassionate therapist who specializes in treating perfectionism. To begin counseling follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free phone consultation 

  2. Meet with a therapist for perfectionism

  3. Start healing from toxic perfectionism 

Online Therapy in Utah 

A woman working on a computer. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy offers online therapy in Utah.

I know it’s not easy to access a therapist that specializes in what you need. It can be inconvenient to travel to a therapy appointment when you don’t have the time. This is why I offer online therapy in Utah. It’s just as effective and helpful as in-person therapy but much more convenient. 

Online counseling means I work with women all over Utah. I work with clients in Logan, Salt Lake City, Provo, St. George, Cedar City, Heber City, and more. 

Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy 

Therapy for perfectionism isn’t the only therapy service provided by this Utah Counseling Practice. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include anxiety therapy, EMDR therapy, eating disorder therapy, counseling for college students, birth trauma therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, and body image therapy. Schedule a consultation today to see how I can help! 

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt LCSW. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides trauma therapy in Utah.

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and found of Maple Canyon Therapy near Provo, Utah. Ashlee obtained her master's degree in social work from Utah State University and two bachelor's degrees in family life and human development and psychology from Southern Utah University. Ashlee has been working with women who struggle with perfectionism since 2013. She loves helping women learn more about self-compassion and to move past the high standards they set for themselves. She enjoys helping women see themselves more accurately and to let go of the anxiety surrounding being a perfectionist. 

People-Pleasing and Perfectionism 

A woman with her hands clasped under her chin. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy offers therapy for perfectionists in Utah.

Being a perfectionist often comes with being a people-pleaser. Not always but the two qualities can come hand in hand. Some perfectionists fixate on their relationships with others and want to show up perfectly. They want to be able to take care of everyone they love, and they certainly want everyone to like them. This might be something hard to admit as a perfectionist and people-pleaser but it’s actually pretty typical. However, if you are a people-pleaser and perfectionist, it’s important to be able to learn to prioritize your own needs and develop healthy boundaries. Sometimes the women I work with don’t see people pleasing or perfectionism as problematic at first but with some awareness, it can start to become more apparent why it might be causing you trouble. 

What does it mean to be a people pleaser?

Being a people pleaser means that you put in extra effort to try and make other people often at your own expense. People-pleasers want to badly meet the needs of other people so much that they disregard their own needs, desires, and opinions. These people will push their own feelings aside in order to avoid conflict or to make another person happy. People leasers have a difficult time setting and maintaining boundaries. They have a hard time telling people “no” even when it might benefit them personally. 

It can be seen as altruistic and a positive quality to want to make other people happy. People-pleasing is often an unhealthy behavior because it leads to burnout, resentment, and other negative consequences. People-pleasers have an intense fear of being disliked and their behaviors can stem from insecurity and low self-esteem. Having these personality traits and struggles can result in people manipulating or taking advantage of you. 

Is people pleasing a form of perfectionism?

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People pleasing definitely can be a form of perfectionism. A sign of perfectionism can be people-pleasing. Both of these tendencies have similar traits such as a desire to be without flaws, being fearful of making mistakes, or failing to meet the expectations of others. People-pleasers may be willing to do whatever it takes to make other people happy and disregard whatever the cost is to themselves. Both perfectionism and people-pleasing may focus more on the opinions of others and the fear of failure. To clarify though, this doesn’t mean all perfectionists are people-pleasers and it doesn’t mean all people-pleasers are perfectionists. 

How are perfectionism and people-pleasing related?

Perfectionism and people-pleasing can be related by the similar characteristics of wanting to live up to high expectations of others or themselves. Perfectionism involves the desire and pursuit of flawlessness, fear of making mistakes, and an intense fear of failure. Perfectionists tend to set high and often unreasonable goals for themselves. They can be relentless in trying to achieve these goals. People-pleasers will sacrifice themselves and their own desires to meet others' expectations. 

Both people-pleasing and perfectionism possess the same qualities of fear of failure and a need for approval from others. People pleasers and perfectionists may both fear rejection and want to avoid conflict.  Perfectionists and people-pleasers are prone to experience anxiety and stress as a result of these behaviors. Both perfectionists and people-pleasers may have strained relationships or a lack of genuine relationships as these behaviors interfere with the quality of interpersonal relationships. 

Why are some people people-pleasers? 

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There are several different reasons why people end up being people pleasers while some people aren’t. Here are some of the common reasons why people become people pleasers. 

  • Early childhood experiences

  • Past trauma 

  • Temperament and personality traits 

  • Religious or cultural expectations 

  • Anxiety 

  • Desire for approval 

  • Low self-esteem

  • Parental influence 

What causes people pleasing?

It’s important to note that some people have learned to people-please as a way of survival. They also have learned that life ends up being easier when you can make people happy and get people to like you. People pleasing can be a skill that can be helpful in certain situations. Being able to read social situations and how to respond effectively ends up being helpful in getting along with others. It can be easy to only demonize people pleasing but to understand that it can be a skill to use but when it crosses the line to impacting your well-being and stems from fear, it’s problematic. 

A group of people smiling and cheering. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women find joy again through helping them recover from trauma using EMDR therapy in Utah.

There is not one simple cause of people-pleasing that could be identified. What is known about people pleasing is that early childhood experiences can have an impact on the development of this behavior. Children may grow up in situations and environments where they didn’t have their needs met or prioritized. They may have been rewarded for prioritizing the needs of others over their own. Children may have learned to cope by using these behaviors in traumatic situations. 

People that struggle with low self-esteem may learn to people please because they learned by doing so they feel validated or valued by other people. Some people possess personality traits that make them want to be highly agreeable or have a need for approval. 

What are examples of people-pleasing behaviors?

It would not be possible to name every single person-pleasing behavior that existed, but there are common themes in people-pleasing behaviors. Here are some of them: 

  • Saying yes to things that you don’t actually want to do 

  • Apologizing for things that aren’t your fault

  • Avoiding expressing your own opinions

  • Changing behaviors or personalities to fit other people's needs

  • Putting other's needs or desires above your own 

  • Overcommitting to things in order to please other people

How to stop people pleasing everyone? 

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One of the most important things you can do to start to combat people-pleasing behaviors is to learn to set boundaries. This means learning to be clear about what your own needs and desires are. Learning to be clear about your own limitations before you are placed in a situation where you might be vulnerable to try and please others will be helpful. Practice saying no more often than you currently do. No can be one of the scariest words for a people pleaser but just like all things it gets easier with time and practice. Challenge your negative beliefs about yourself. Often the need to people please can be fueled by a negative attitude or thought about yourself. It might be different for everyone but often the belief that you aren’t good enough contribute to the cycle of people-pleasing. Seeking support from others including a mental health professional is important in being able to overcome people-pleasing behaviors. It’s not easy to let go of this pattern of behavior and it will take the support and help of people that are safe and can be supportive of you.  

The Connection Between People-Pleasing and Toxic Perfectionism

If you feel like you have to meet everyone’s expectations perfectly or avoid disappointing others at all costs, toxic perfectionism might play a role. People-pleasing isn’t just as simple as wanting to be liked. It can also come from the pressure to always say the right thing, do things flawlessly, and never let anyone down. Toxic perfectionism makes it feel like your worth depends on getting everything "just right," which can leave you feeling exhausted and anxious. The truth is, no one gets it right all the time, and you don’t have to. Anxiety therapy can help untangle these patterns so you can start showing up as yourself, without the fear of falling short.

Overcoming Perfectionism and Learning to Let Go

Letting go of toxic perfectionism doesn’t mean lowering your standards; it means freeing yourself from the fear of never being enough. If you’ve spent years believing that your value comes from pleasing others or getting everything just right, it can feel uncomfortable to step back. But overcoming perfectionism starts with small shifts like challenging the thoughts that tell you mistakes aren’t allowed, practicing self-compassion, and recognizing that your worth isn’t tied to how much you do for others. You don’t have to earn rest, love, or acceptance. Therapy for anxiety can help you unlearn perfectionism in a way that still honors your goals—without the constant pressure to prove yourself.

Therapy for perfectionism can help you overcome people-pleasing 

Therapy can provide you with valuable tools to challenge both people-pleasing behaviors and perfectionistic tendencies. Working with a therapist that specializes in treating perfectionism and people-pleasing can help you become more self-aware. You can learn to cultivate more self-compassion for where you struggle and learn to improve upon the behaviors you want to. Therapy provides a safe environment to be able to practice being assertive and to address the underlying issues and experiences that may have led you to cope with life through people-pleasing and being a perfectionist. 

Start therapy for perfectionists in Utah 

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You can learn to put your own needs first. You can learn to say no and still feel confident in yourself and your relationships. Therapy can help! This Utah Counseling Center has an anxiety therapist that specializes in working with recovering people-pleasers and perfectionists. To begin therapy follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with a caring therapist

  3. Begin recovery from people-pleasing and perfectionism

Online Therapy in Utah 

Online therapy offers you the convenience of accessing mental health therapy without you having to travel or commute to a therapy appointment. Online therapy sessions are just as effective as in-person therapy sessions and this is why I offer online therapy in Utah. You can meet with an online therapist to address your perfectionism from the comfort of your own home or office. 

Online counseling means I work with clients in Salt Lake City, Logan, Heber City, St. George, Provo, Cedar City, and more. 

Other mental health services at Maple Canyon Therapy 

Therapy for perfectionism isn’t the only therapy service provided at this Utah Counseling Practice. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include anxiety therapy, EMDR therapy, eating disorder therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, body image therapy, counseling for college students, and birth trauma therapy. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation to start therapy 

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt LCSW and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy near Provo Utah. Maple Canyon Therapy provides trauma therapy in Utah.

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy near Provo, Utah. Ashlee has a bachelor's degree in psychology and a bachelor's degree in family life and human development both from Southern Utah University. She obtained her master's in social work from Utah State University. Ashlee loves helping women shed their need for perfectionism and to challenge themselves to say no and to not people-please. She enjoys using EMDR to address the desire to be approved of by others and to lessen the holds that perfectionism has on the women she works with. Outside of therapy, Ashlee enjoys spending time outside with her dogs and exploring parts of Southern Utah. 

Perfectionism: What’s the problem?

A woman looking at her computer. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides therapy for perfectionists in Utah.

You might be reading this and aren’t convinced you are a perfectionist. Nah, you don’t have perfectionism tendencies. You know other people who do but that’s not you. You might be surprised that there are areas in your life where you are a perfectionist but maybe not all areas. There could be signs you are a perfectionist that you’re missing. Some of the women I work with are so perfectionistic they don’t believe they’re doing perfectionism well enough so they deny it even being a struggle. You may be here because you know that you struggle with perfectionism or someone you love struggles with it. 

What is perfectionism?

Perfectionism is a personality trait focusing on the need for situations or behaviors to be without flaws. Perfectionists want to have order and control and might use these behaviors more when life feels more chaotic. Women with perfectionism hold high standards for themselves and sometimes others. When they can’t achieve these standards they might feel upset or self-critical. 

The tricky part of perfectionism is that it can reap positive results and can be reinforced as a good thing by other people. Perfectionists tend to be high achieving, motivated, and responsible. The downside of perfectionism is that it can lead to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Perfectionism can also have a negative impact on relationships and social interactions. Perfectionists struggle to delegate tasks to other people or trust that they’ll be able to live up to their standards. 

Is perfectionism a mental illness?

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Perfectionism isn’t a diagnosable mental illness in the DSM manual. It can be a symptom of other underlying mental health conditions such as OCD, anxiety, depression, and eating disorders. Perfectionism can also be a way that people to cope with their mental health issues to try and alleviate anxiety but they don’t realize how problematic this is. Perfectionists don’t realize they are dealing with high-functioning anxiety. Perfectionism can lead to heightened stress and self-criticism. Perfectionists find that their tendencies impact their ability to engage in daily functioning and don’t align with their personal values and goals. 

What is the cause of perfectionism?

This is not an easy question to answer. Perfectionism is likely impacted both by temperament and personality traits as well as life experiences. Here are some common causes of perfectionism: 

  • Childhood experiences

  • Parental criticism 

  • Growing up in environments with high standards 

  • Religious upbringing 

  • Personality traits 

  • Societal pressures 

  • Trauma 

  • Mental health issues 

How do I stop being a perfectionist? 

A black woman smiling and taking a selfie. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women gain self-confidence by providing eating disorder therapy in Utah.

It’s not easy to will yourself to stop being a perfectionist especially when it’s complicated and there are many reasons why you are struggling with perfectionism. Here are some things to consider trying: 

  1. Identify situations, people, places, or emotions that trigger perfectionistic tendencies 

  2. Practice using self-compassion 

  3. Challenge yourself to be more flexible and realistic with your goals 

  4. Utilize more positive self-talk 

  5. Focus on your values rather than on the outcome 

  6. Consider going to therapy and getting the help of a mental health professional 

Can perfectionism be good?

Yes, perfectionism can have positive aspects. Having high standards and trying to achieve success is not inherently a bad thing. Perfectionists strive for excellence and are motivated to achieve their goals. However, it becomes problematic behavior when it is rigid and relentless. Perfectionists strive for success at whatever cost including sleep, physical health, and emotional well-being. Perfectionism can be a result of trying to manage anxiety or deal with low self-esteem. It can cover the root issues without addressing them, which can lead to feeling burned out. 

Understanding Toxic Perfectionism and Its Impact on Mental Health

Believe it or not, not all perfectionism is helpful at all. When high expectations turn into self-criticism, toxic perfectionism can take over, making it feel like nothing you do is ever good enough. Instead of feeling motivated, you might find yourself stuck in a cycle of procrastination, burnout, or even avoiding things altogether because you're afraid of failing. Toxic perfectionism isn’t just about wanting to do well. Toxic perfectionism is the constant pressure to meet impossible standards, often at the expense of your mental health. In anxiety therapy, we work on untangling these patterns so you can strive for personal growth without the weight of never feeling good enough.

Toxic perfectionism and anxiety often go hand in hand. When you're constantly chasing impossible standards, your nervous system stays on high alert, always scanning for mistakes or ways you might fall short. This creates a cycle where anxiety fuels perfectionism, and perfectionism fuels more anxiety, making it hard to ever feel calm and at ease. You might find yourself overanalyzing and overthinking every decision, replaying conversations in your head, or feeling paralyzed by the fear of getting something wrong. Anxiety therapy helps break this cycle by challenging perfectionist thinking patterns and creating space for self-compassion, so you can learn to trust yourself without the constant weight of anxiety symptoms.

Are eating disorders and perfectionism related?

A woman looking in the mirror. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women become body positive through therapy for eating disorders in Utah.

Eating disorders are often related to having perfectionistic behavior. People with perfectionistic tendencies are more likely to develop eating disorders. The women I work with often want to have perfectionism in all aspects of their lives including their bodies, food, and eating behaviors. When you struggle with perfectionism, you might use food, your body size, and your appearance as a way of controlling your life or being viewed in a positive light by others. Many perfectionists struggle with body image issues. These behaviors lead to disordered eating such as restricting, binging, purging, and excessive exercise. Both perfectionism and eating disorders can reinforce each other and require professional help from a mental health professional. 

How do I know I have perfectionism? 

Every person that experiences perfectionism has unique challenges and qualities. These are some examples of qualities that might indicate you struggle with perfectionism. 

  1. Having overly high standards for yourself. You hold yourself to high standards that you may not hold others to and is difficult to achieve. You may never feel satisfied with yourself despite how well you do. 

  2. Seeing things in black and white. You struggle to be flexible with your thoughts and think in extremes. You view yourself in extremes and absolutes. You view your mistakes and flaws as failures. 

  3. Procrastinating doing things for fear they won’t be perfect. This is an area where people don’t think they have perfectionism because they procrastinate. However, the reason they procrastinate is because of feeling overwhelmed by trying to complete tasks perfectly. 

  4. Avoiding challenges and difficulties. You might avoid taking risks or participating in things you may want to do for fear of not being able to do them perfectly. 

  5. Being critical of yourself. Perfectionists tend to ruminate on things they did or said that they believe fall below the standards they set for themselves. You belittle and berate yourself for not doing well enough. 

  6. Fear of failure. You have anxiety and intense fears of not being successful or meeting your own standards or the standards you believe others have for you. 

  7. Difficulty relaxing and resting. It's hard for you to let yourself not be productive and have a hard time resting because you are concerned about all that you need to do and focus on. 

  8. Relationship difficulties. You have a hard time being vulnerable and connecting in relationships because you are guarded with anything that might be perceived as a flaw by others. You may also struggle with having too high of standards for others and are critical of others. 

How common is perfectionism?

Three women looking toward something. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women overcome anxiety by providing therapy for anxiety in Utah.

Perfectionism is not an uncommon personality trait and may become more common due to the influence of social media. Research suggests a statistic of 20-40 percent of people struggle with perfectionistic tendencies. Every individual might struggle with different areas of perfectionism. Some individuals might be perfectionistic about work and school while others are perfectionistic about their appearance and behaviors. 

How is perfectionism a problem?

Perfectionists often experience high levels of anxiety and stress due to their high expectations of themselves and their intense fear of failure. Those with perfectionism are overly critical of themselves and experience symptoms of low self-esteem. Perfectionists may procrastinate because of their fear of not being able to perform or complete a task perfectly. Physical health problems are also common in those who struggle with perfectionism such as gut and digestive issues, insomnia, headaches, and stress and anxiety related to their high-achieving tendencies. 

Can perfectionism cause anxiety? 

I often describe perfectionism as an anxiety management tool for those who struggle with anxiety. This coping skill is problematic in many ways but for those with anxiety, it helps them feel more in control. Those with anxiety struggle with fear of failure and being viewed in a negative light, focusing on perfectionistic tendencies and achieving goals might lower anxiety in these people. The need for perfectionism also leads to higher symptoms of anxiety. Perfectionism can cause a cycle of anxiety when they experience not being able to meet their own expectations and standards for themselves. Procrastination and avoiding starting tasks because of the desire to be perfect can result in greater anxiety. 

Overcoming Perfectionism

Another key part of overcoming perfectionism is learning to tolerate discomfort. Perfectionists often avoid situations where they might fail, but overcoming perfectionism requires letting yourself make mistakes. Therapy for perfectionism encourages gradually facing fears of imperfection without doing the usual "fixing" behaviors. This might mean intentionally making small mistakes—sending an email without triple-checking, leaving a typo in your notes, or turning in an assignment without over-editing. At first, these moments may feel uncomfortable, but over time, your brain learns that mistakes aren’t dangerous. The more you expose yourself to imperfection without trying to "fix" it, the less anxiety it causes.

As you work toward letting go of perfectionism, be patient and kind with yourself. Change doesn’t happen as quickly as we hope sometimes and the goal isn’t to become perfect at not being perfect. It’s about practicing self-compassion and recognizing that your value and purpose are not based on productivity, achievement, or how well you meet high standards. Therapy teaches that the more you sit with discomfort instead of reacting to it, the easier it becomes. Therapy for perfectionism can be a powerful space to explore these patterns and learn new ways of coping.  With the support of therapy, you can step out of the exhausting cycle of perfectionism and find relief.

Therapy for perfectionism can help

A woman sitting on a couch. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women struggling with disordered eating by providing disordered eating therapy in Utah.

Going to therapy can help perfectionists be able to learn to cope with the need to be perfect. Therapy for perfectionism can also help you dive into the underlying reasons that may be contributing to having unrealistically high standards for yourself. Therapy will be able to help you have more self-compassion and lessen the impact your perfectionistic traits have on your well-being and your ability to engage in daily functioning. Working with a therapist can help you challenge the negative beliefs you have about yourself and work through past trauma that may be impacting how you view yourself and others. 

Start therapy for perfectionism in Utah 

You don’t have to keep feeling overwhelmed by a fear of failure. You can have less anxiety and lessen your need to have high standards for yourself. Therapy for perfectionism can help! This Utah Counseling Practice has an anxiety therapist specializing in treating perfectionism. To begin counseling follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with a therapist for perfection 

  3. Being therapy for perfectionists 

Online Therapy in Utah 

A woman holding an electronic tablet. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides online therapy in Utah.

It can be difficult to take time out of your school or work schedule to travel to a therapy appointment. It can also be a challenge when you don’t have a therapist that treats perfectionism in your town. This is why I provide online therapy in Utah. Online therapy is just as effective as in-person therapy but it means you don’t have to worry about leaving your house to try and attend a therapy appointment. 

Online counseling means I work with clients in Salt Lake City, St. George, Provo, Heber City, Cedar City, Logan, and more. 

Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy 

Therapy for perfectionism isn’t the only counseling service provided by this Utah Counseling Center. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include eating disorder therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, EMDR therapy, counseling for college students, birth trauma therapy, and body image therapy. Schedule a free phone consultation to see how I can help! 

About the Author 

A photo of Ashlee Hunt, a Utah therapist providing Binge Eating Disorder Treatment in Utah

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy in Utah. Ashlee has a master's degree in social work from Utah State University. She also studied psychology and family life and human development at Southern Utah University and achieved bachelor's degrees in both subjects. Ashlee enjoys working with women who experience perfectionism by helping them provide more self-compassion and patience for themselves. She recognizes how hard it is to let go of the need to be pe perfect and believes it's possible In her free time, Ashlee loves exploring southern Utah and riding her ebike through Snow Canyon State Park. 

Why Don’t Therapists Take Insurance?

A clipboard with forms on it. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps client work through their past trauma by providing EMDR therapy in Utah.

Therapists taking insurance is a hot topic in the therapist community and something that is confusing to clients. I’m not here to argue or say what’s right or wrong but I can present the facts about insurance along with what my experience has been. I have been paneled with several insurances in the past and now am a private pay therapist. I have worked in treatment centers and have had plenty of experience with insurance in the past. 

The thing that is important to remember is there is no right or wrong to therapists taking insurance. If you need to use your insurance, that’s totally understandable! I make choices for myself and my business that are best for me, and I want you to feel empowered to do the same for yourself. 

Reasons why therapists don’t take insurance 

Insurance companies reimburse therapists less than they do other professionals 

The majority of insurance companies pay therapists far below what they pay other healthcare professionals with the same degree and experience. When you get paneled with certain insurance companies they make the therapist sign a contract but they might not disclose how much they will pay you. Therapists have gone to years of school and have student debt and bills to pay just like every other professional but insurance company pay really low rates for their services. 

Insurance companies require a diagnosis 

In order for insurance companies to agree to pay for your therapy sessions, they require the therapist to give you a diagnosis. That’s not a big deal to some people but having a diagnosis can be harmful. There are also many people that seek therapy because they want to improve themselves and feel better but they don’t necessarily have a diagnosis. Insurance companies will not pay for these people to go to therapy. The diagnosis that is given to you in therapy can impact your life and stay on your health records long after you’ve been treated for it. These diagnoses might prevent you from opportunities or experiences you might want in the future. Recently, I had an experience when applying for life insurance and they were required to know all mental health diagnoses, which could impact someone's ability to be insured. 

Insurance companies dictate your care 

Wooden blogs with healthcare symbols on them. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides eating disorder therapy in Utah.

Along with a diagnosis, insurance companies get to decide how long you see your therapist. They don’t want to have to pay for your treatment beyond what they need to. If they believe you don’t need therapy anymore they will not pay for it. Often times therapists are put in ethical dilemmas to make it seem like you are doing worse than they are so that insurance will pay for their sessions. Insurance companies will also only pay for certain issues but they won’t tell you what those issues are so if what you are struggling with isn’t one of those covered areas, they won’t pay for your session. This leaves you with a bill you didn’t expect or your therapist doesn’t get paid for the time they spent focused on helping you. 

Insurance companies are not confidential 

While therapists are required to abide by HIPAA and keep their information confidential, that doesn’t mean an insurance company will honor your confidentiality. Insurance companies have had thousands and thousands of HIPAA violations. Disclosing your information to a third party makes it easier for your information to not be protected once it leaves a therapist's hands. If you want a federal job, to join the military, or be a pilot, an insurance company can disclose your diagnoses. 

Insurance companies can take months to pay the therapist

There’s no way around living without getting paid. As much care and compassion as I have for my clients, I can’t feed my family without money. It’s the world we live in, and it’s unfair to assume therapists don’t deserve repayment for their services in a timely manner. Insurance companies will take months and months to pay your therapist for your therapy session. When I was paneled with insurance, it took me six months to be paid by an insurance company. This is a practice that makes it so therapists don’t take insurance because they may never be paid. 

Wood blogs with letters that say FAQ. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy offers answers to frequently asked questions. In addition, Maple Canyon Therapy provides therapy for perfectionism in Utah.

Questions people ask about therapists and insurance 

People have a lot of questions and assumptions about therapists not taking insurance. Here are some of the common ones. 

Isn’t it unethical for therapists to not take insurance?

There is no ethical boundary for a therapist to take insurance. Therapists ethically need to be competent and have integrity. There are many questions for some people on how to support insurance companies who make billions of dollars every year while denying paying for their subscriber's healthcare or reimbursing their providers can be ethical. I don’t think there’s a right or wrong to accepting or denying insurance but it’s not unethical by any means to not accept insurance. 

Do you just expect people to be able to pay your fee?

Nope. I don’t expect anyone to pay me anything. I’m never here to convince people to spend their money on seeing me as a therapist. I want you to make the decision that makes sense for your finances and for your lifestyle. It’s your choice what you do with your money, and I won’t tell you otherwise. I set my fee based on the number of how much I need to survive and give quality care to my clients. It’s not that I think I’m worth a certain dollar amount but it’s just a number to help me and my family survive. 

I wholeheartedly believe therapy can change lives, and that is the exact energy I bring to my therapy sessions. I believe in my clients and their ability to transcend far beyond what they are struggling with. I have paid out of pocket for a loved one’s therapy for several years, and it’s worth it to me. That doesn’t mean that’s something that has to be important to you. Not taking insurance for a therapist saves them more time to focus on taking care of you rather than chasing down money from a claim. 

Two chairs with a table in between. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides binge eating disorder treatment in Utah.

Looking to start therapy for anxiety in Utah?

If you are struggling with anxiety and want to be able to find relief, I would love to be able to help! This Utah Counseling Practice has a therapist for anxiety specializing in anxiety therapy. To begin therapy follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with an anxiety therapist

  3. Find relief from anxiety symptoms 

Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy 

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only mental health service provided by this Utah Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include EMDR therapy, eating disorder therapy, body image therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, counseling for college students, and birth trauma therapy. Schedule a phone consultation to see how I can help! 

Online Therapy in Utah 

I know it can be hard to take time out of your busy schedule to drive to a therapy appointment. It’s also difficult when you might not a therapist in your town that treats the issues you are struggling with. This is why I provide online therapy in Utah. It’s just as effective as in-person therapy but without the inconvenience. 

Online counseling allows me to work with clients no matter where they live in Utah. I work with clients in Provo, Salt Lake City, Logan, Cedar City, St. George, Heber city, and more. 

Ashlee Hunt LCSW. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides therapy for emotional eating in Utah.

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy in Utah. Ashlee has a master's degree in social work from Utah State University. She also has a bachelor's degree in psychology and a bachelor's degree in family life and human development from Southern Utah University. Ashlee has been working with women who have anxiety for over a decade. She loves to help the clients she works with deal with their anxiousness by utilizing self-compassion. She believes that anxiety can become far more manageable and doesn’t have to take over your life. 

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5 Things I’ll Never Say Because I’m an Eating Disorder Therapist 

A woman writing on a notepad. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy has an eating disorder therapist providing eating disorder treatment in Utah.

I’m going to let you in on a little secret: all of what I’m about to share are triggering statements to the people you love who struggle with their relationship with food. You have no idea who you are sitting with that is struggling with how they feel about themselves and their body. The statements that I’m about to share have come up in eating disorder group therapy many times that cause frustration and anxiety. Our language is so powerful, and we can use it in positive ways to be kind, uplifting, and compassionate. We can also use it to perpetuate negative messaging and instill the importance of our bodies being the most valuable. 

My goal in sharing these things is to help you understand the impact of your language and your messaging. When we know better, we can respond better. Hopefully, you’ll give yourself grace for what you’ve said unknowingly. 

Statements I will never say as an eating disorder therapist

There are plenty of things not to say because it can impact the people around us. Things are some of the things I know to never say because of the own work I have done and because of the eating disorder clients I work with. 

“You’ve lost weight!  You look so good!”

I won’t comment on anyone’s body whether they’ve lost weight, gained weight, or maintained weight. Your body shape and size are the least interesting things about you. I never want to place value on a person’s body size. I have no idea how someone has lost weight. Many people lose weight because they are sick or engaging in disordered eating behaviors. Commenting on weight loss perpetuates the importance of losing weight or changing a person’s body size. When you tell someone they look good because they’ve lost weight, this unknowingly tells someone they didn’t look good before. 

A plate with dice that say dieting sucks. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides EMDR for binge eating in Utah.

“ The diet starts Monday!”

I want to say this as lovingly as possible, nobody wants to hear about your diet. Other people who have disordered eating habits will want to engage in this conversation but even then these conversations lead to feeling insecure about yourself. You don’t have to have to plan on restricting later to have a right to eat what you want and what feels good. Dieting ultimately leads to weight gain in 95 percent of people by two years after the completion of the diet. Talking about dieting, encouraging others to diet, and dieting yourself aren’t the way to go. 

“I’m so bad for eating this” 

Implying that you are” bad” for eating something places morals on food. Food is neither good nor bad. What you eat doesn’t change your worth, and you shouldn’t feel guilty for eating regardless of what it is. Saying comments like this also makes other people feel guilty for eating the same thing. I encourage people not to say anything about the nutritional value of food or why they aren’t eating a certain food group. Eating intuitively and listening to your body is the best approach

“Ugh, I’m so fat!” 

Just like I encourage you to not comment on other people’s bodies, don’t talk about your body either. Talking about how fat or disgusting you are sending messages to those around you that maybe there is something wrong with their bodies. When you talk about your body in a negative way people may also wonder what you are negatively thinking about their body. It doesn’t matter how underwhelmed or uncomfortable I am in my own body, I’m not going to say negative things about my body out loud to other people. All bodies are good bodies. We all come in different shapes and sizes and we aren’t meant to fit into one mold. Please don’t speak negatively about your body.

“I’ll have to work this off later.” 

A woman exercising. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women become more body positive by providing therapy for body image issues in Utah.

When you make comments about having to exercise in regard to what you are eating, you are implying that you need to be punished. Your body needs food, and you don’t have to use compensatory behaviors later to feel ok about that. We exercise our bodies in ways that feel good and help our overall health. It’s not a healthy behavior to exercise to try and “work off” food that you’ve eaten. If you are trying to be healthy, this isn’t the way to do it. These comments are also encouraging others to feel guilty for what they’ve eaten too.

Disordered eating therapy can help you improve your relationship with food and your body

If you are struggling with how you feel about yourself and have a bad relationship with food, going to therapy can help. If you find yourself caught up in feeling guilty for what you eat, get stuck in the cycle of dieting and restricting, and view exercise as punitive, counseling can be helpful. When you look in the mirror and you feel disgusted and hateful about your body, it’s a sign that therapy can help you work on your body image. You don’t have to keep feeling anxiety about what you eat or believe you are undeserving of what you eat. You can feel better about yourself by working with an eating disorder therapist. 

A couch with pillows on it. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides therapy for emotional eating in Utah using a health at every size approach.

Start working with an eating disorder therapist in Utah 

You don’t have to keep hating your body, and feeling anxious about food, and you don’t have to punish yourself. You can feel comfortable with your body and find food freedom. Working with an eating disorder therapist can help. This Utah Counseling Practice has an eating disorder therapist specializing in disordered eating. To begin counseling follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with a disordered eating therapist 

  3. Begin disordered eating therapy

Online eating disorder therapy in Utah 

It’s important to find a therapist who specializes in eating disorders and disordered eating. This requires specialized training and many cities in Utah don’t have access to a therapist who has this training. This is why I offer online therapy in Utah. I am able to work with clients struggling with their relationships all over the state. Online counseling is just as effective as in-person therapy but you don’t have to travel. 

Online therapy means I work with clients in Salt Lake City, Cedar City, St. George, Logan, Heber City, Provo, and more. 

Other mental health services at Maple Canyon Therapy  

Disordered eating therapy isn’t the only therapy offered at this Utah Counseling Practice. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include anxiety therapy, EMDR therapy, body image therapy, therapy for college students, therapy for birth trauma, and binge eating disorder treatment in Utah. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation to see how I can help! 

Ashlee Hunt LCSW. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides therapy for eating disorders in Utah through online therapy in Utah.

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt is an eating disorder therapist and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy in Utah. Ashlee has a master's degree in social work from Utah State University. She has two bachelor's degrees from Southern Utah University in psychology and family life and human development. Ashlee has worked with women with eating disorders from the beginning of her therapy career. She has worked a an eating disorder psychiatric hospital providing individual and group therapy to patients with eating disorders at all levels of care. Ashlee loves helping women heal their relationships with food and to feel more comfortable in their own skin. 

Other blog posts by Maple Canyon Therapy

3 Parks in Provo, Utah to Calm Your Anxiety 

Living with anxiety can be challenging, but moments of peace and tranquility can make a world of difference. In Provo, Utah, several parks offer an escape from daily stress and a chance to find solace in nature. In anxiety therapy, we focus on using ways to calm and relax your nervous system. From the serene trails of Paul Ream Wilderness Park to the soothing sounds of the Provo River at Riverside Park and the awe-inspiring rock formations of Rock Canyon Park, these natural spaces facilitate relaxation techniques, using anxiety coping skills and connection with nature.

1. Paul Ream Wilderness Park

Paul Ream Wilderness Park is a scenic and natural recreational area located in Provo, Utah. Nestled in the foothills of the Wasatch Mountains, the park offers a peaceful and serene escape from any chaos or stress and spans over 80 acres of diverse landscapes, featuring lush greenery, rugged canyons, and breathtaking views. As an anxiety therapist, I want you to be able to find ways to help your body relax. One of those ways is to spend time in nature. Taking a leisurely walk along the park's trails can be a calming and grounding experience. Walking provides bilateral stimulation for anxiety.  The serene surroundings, fresh air, and natural beauty can help reduce stress and promote relaxation when dealing with anxiety symptoms. Engage your senses by paying attention to the sights, sounds, and smells of the park, allowing yourself to be fully present in the moment.

2. Riverside Park

Riverside Park is a popular public park located in Provo, Utah. Situated along the banks of the Provo River, the park offers a beautiful and serene outdoor space for residents and visitors to enjoy. It spans approximately 35 acres and provides a range of amenities and activities for people of all ages. The park's most prominent feature is, of course, the Provo River itself. The river meanders through the park, creating a peaceful and picturesque setting. The flowing water, accompanied by the gentle sound of its movement, adds to the park's tranquil ambiance. Sitting by the Provo River can be a soothing and calming experience, offering a serene environment to cope with anxiety. As a therapist for anxiety, I recommend for you to engage in mindfulness meditation while sitting by the river. Bring your attention to the sounds of the flowing water, the sensation of the breeze on your skin, and the sights and smells of nature. Allow yourself to fully immerse in the present experience, observing any thoughts or emotions without judgment.

3. Rock Canyon Park 

The centerpiece of Rock Canyon Park is the majestic rock formations that tower above the surrounding landscape. These towering cliffs provide a dramatic backdrop and make Rock Canyon a favorite destination for rock climbers and outdoor enthusiasts seeking a challenge. The park features numerous climbing routes suitable for climbers of different skill levels, allowing them to test their abilities against the vertical walls and enjoy breathtaking views from the top. One tool we discuss in anxiety therapy is progressive muscle relaxation. This park would offer a good opportunity to practice it Find a comfortable spot in the park and practice progressive muscle relaxation. Starting from your toes, consciously tense and then release each muscle group in your body, focusing on the sensation of relaxation as you let go of tension. This technique can help relieve physical tension and promote a sense of calm.

Meeting with a therapist for anxiety in Utah can help you cope with anxiety 

Meeting with an anxiety therapist and starting anxiety therapy can be a comforting and helpful way to cope with anxiety. As a therapist for anxiety, I care about my clients and want to listen to their worries and provide support.  Anxiety counseling is a safe space where you can express your feelings without judgment. Through talking and sharing, anxiety therapy can help you gain insight into your anxiety and develop coping skills. Whether it is relaxation techniques that can ease your anxious thoughts and calm your mind or digging into the deeper reason you have anxiety, anxiety treatment can help. . . Remember, seeking help from an anxiety counselor is a courageous step towards taking care of your well-being, and they are there to assist you on your journey toward healing and finding peace.

Start anxiety therapy in Utah

If you're struggling with anxiety in Utah, it's time to take action and seek the support you deserve. Don't let anxiety hold you back from living a fulfilling life. This Utah Counseling Center has an anxiety therapist specializing in treating anxiety. To begin anxiety treatment follow these steps: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with a therapist for anxiety

  3. Begin managing your anxiety better

How EMDR Therapy Can Treat Eating Disorders

A woman facing another woman smiling. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy has an EMDR therapist helping women overcome their trauma through EMDR therapy in Utah.

Several years ago I was trained in EMDR therapy, and I fell in love with it. I couldn’t believe the outcomes it had for my clients. EMDR has been so effective for the clients I work with that even they have been shocked at what a difference it makes. Just yesterday I was laughing with one of my clients about how she was having a difficult time believing that it was EMDR that made such a drastic improvement in her body image in a short amount of time. I love EMDR because it has so much power to free people from their negative beliefs about themselves. EMDR therapy helps people find relief from the painful experiences they have held onto for years. 

EMDR has incredibly positive impacts on people with trauma. Treating PTSD was what EMDR was used for in the beginning. As therapists and researchers we have since found many ways to use EMDR as a tool to help people struggling with many things. Eating disorders included. I have found EMDR therapy to help women who have been struggling with body image and disordered eating to help with eating disorder recovery. It truly is impressive to witness and for my clients to experience.

How does EMDR therapy help treat eating disorders?

I’m sure you have questions about what EMDR is, and how it helps with eating disorders. Eating disorders are rooted in so much more than food, weight, and appearance. My favorite type of work to do with clients is to go deeper and look at the root of things in therapy rather than just surface-level things. EMDR allows us to do that together. Women (and men but I mostly treat women) with eating disorders hold so many negative beliefs about themselves and their bodies. Commonly, my clients believe they’re not good enough, they’re powerless, or things that have happened in their lives are all their fault. 

A woman in sunglasses celebrating. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women become body positive through body image therapy in Utah.

EMDR therapy focuses on changing negative beliefs 

The negative beliefs experienced us as humans are derived from experiences. Those experiences don’t have to be classified as traumatic experiences but they might be experiences that you had during important and critical times of your life. Being called ugly by someone in middle school might not feel like a traumatic experience but in a lot of ways our brains store them that way. That experience can influence how you feel about yourself for the rest of your life. Why can’t you just get over it? Why do you have to keep thinking about it? The way the brain has stored this experience is still going to impact your present functioning. 

EMDR therapy helps shift your eating disorder beliefs

Using the middle school example, when doing EMDR we would go back to that experience and target the negative belief about ourselves. An essential component of EMDR therapy is bilateral stimulation. Bilateral stimulation is what opens up all the emotions and thoughts you have as a result of that experience but it also helps you work through it. People can be skeptical that there is a point in working through the past. The truth is you probably don’t want to go back there because it’s painful and it can feel pointless to feel pain for no reason. However, our past experiences are directly dictating our present functioning. This is why we go back to those experiences to change how we think and feel about ourselves. 

How I have seen EMDR help women with eating disorders 

When someone has an eating disorder, we don’t jump into EMDR right away. We first need to make sure they are medically stable and are able to have nourishment. Just like medications aren’t as effective for those that aren’t receiving adequate nutrition, EMDR isn’t going to be what we use first. It wouldn’t be humane for me to open up about all your past experiences and negative beliefs if we weren’t certain you had enough healthy coping skills to use as you work through it. When it comes to EMDR therapy, we don’t want to make your eating disorder worse if we don’t properly prepare for it. 

My clients who are utilizing the people in their lives for support, are working on fueling their bodies, and have adequate coping skills are able to use EMDR to feel better about themselves. They are able to make shifts in the beliefs they hold about their body and appearance. EMDR helps lessen anxiety about eating and weight gain. EMDR has many positive effects in supporting you in eating disorder recovery. 

A woman celebrating with her hand in the air. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides therapy for body image issues in Utah.

EMDR for Eating Disorders can make a big difference 

While EMDR is by no means the only tool in helping you overcome your eating disorder but it does hold so much significance and power. You deserve to feel better about yourself, to feel less afraid of weight gain, and to realize you deserve so much more than what you are offering yourself. Eating disorder recovery takes effort and focus, and EMDR therapy is able to help you achieve those things. I love to be able to see those that I work with feel less consumed by their body image, anxiety, and sadness. I have seen how EMDR lifts the burden, and I want you to have the same experience too. 

Start working with an eating disorder therapist in Utah 

You don’t have to feel stuck in your eating disorder. You don’t have to keep believing you’re not good enough. You can find relief from anxiety, and therapy can help! This Utah Counseling Clinic has an eating disorder therapist specializing in both EMDR therapy and eating disorder therapy. To begin counseling follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with an EMDR therapist 

  3. Find relief from your eating disorder

A photo of a woman smiling at her computer. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women manage their symptoms of anxiety through anxiety therapy.

Online Eating Disorder Therapy in Utah 

When you are struggling with an eating disorder, you want the assurance of working with a therapist that has the training and knows exactly how to help you in eating disorder recovery. Utah has many places that don’t have access to an eating disorder therapist making it difficult to access this specialized therapy. This is why I offer online therapy in Utah. Online eating disorder therapy means you don’t have to travel to meet with a therapist, and it’s just as effective as in-person therapy. 

Online counseling means I work with people in Provo, Logan, Salt Lake City, Cedar City, St. George, Heber City, and more. 

Other Mental Health Services Provided by Maple Canyon Therapy 

Eating disorder therapy and EMDR therapy aren’t the only counseling services provided at this Utah Counseling Center. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include binge eating disorder treatment, anxiety therapy, birth trauma therapy, counseling for college students, and body image therapy. Reach out today to schedule a phone consultation to see how I can help. 

Ashlee Hunt LCSW. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy  provides therapy for emotional eating using a health at every size approach

About the Author

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy in Utah. Ashlee has a master's degree in social work from Utah State University. She also holds two bachelor's degrees from Southern Utah University in psychology and family life and human development. Ashlee has been working with women with eating disorders since her first experience as a therapist at the USU Counseling Center in Logan, Utah. She has worked at all levels of eating disorder care including inpatient, residential, partial hospitalization, intensive outpatient, and outpatient therapy. Ashlee is passionate about helping women be kind to their bodies and leave their eating disorders behind through acceptance and commitment therapy, EMDR therapy, and more. 

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How To Start Eating Disorder Recovery

The back of a woman walking. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women struggling to find their way by providing eating disorder treatment in Utah.

It can be an overwhelming experience to realize you have symptoms of an eating disorder. You may have spent a while feeling like your behaviors with food and your body wasn’t anything to be concerned about. You may have felt shocked when you recognized that you might have an eating disorder. You might still be skeptical that what you are actually dealing with is an eating disorder but you might be considering your options. No matter where you’re at, it’s ok to be where you are. It’s also important that you know it gets better than this. You don’t have to struggle with an eating disorder alone. Eating disorder recovery is worth the investment but it might be difficult to figure out where to begin. 

What is eating disorder recovery?

Eating disorder recovery involves the healing of eating disorder symptoms. The goal of eating disorder recovery is to help those struggling with an eating disorder be able to improve their relationship with food and their body. Eating disorder recovery involves being able to challenge negative beliefs about yourself and the world. As an eating disorder therapist, I want to help my clients be able to eat without anxiety and not feel more neutral about their body image. 

What are the steps to start eating disorder recovery?

Two people’s legs walking up steps. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps women find the steps to eating disorder recovery through therapy for emotional eating, disordered eating therapy and more

Many of the women I work with want to know exactly what to expect before they start the process of trying to overcome their eating disorders. Eating disorder therapy is so individual depending on what you are struggling with so there’s no way to give a comprehensive answer. However, these are some steps to start eating disorder recovery that is beneficial. 

Tell someone safe you’re struggling with disordered eating 

You may be feeling embarrassed and ashamed for struggling with disordered eating. It can feel terrifying to open up to someone about having an eating disorder, and I completely understand being hesitant to do so. It’s uncomfortable talking about disordered eating and body image issues. However, it’s important that you have support throughout this process. People that utilize support outside of therapy are the most likely to make a full recovery from having an eating disorder. Choose someone that you know won’t be judgmental, will listen, and you feel safe talking to. 

Be open to eating disorder therapy 

To make a full and complete recovery from your eating disorder, enlisting the help of a professional is essential. I know how badly you want to figure this out yourself but as an eating disorder therapist I have spent a lot of time and money to be educated and trained on exactly how to help you BECAUSE I WANT TO HELP YOU AND YOU DESERVE IT. You absolutely deserve not to have to do this alone. It can be hard to reach out for help when you don’t know what to expect from eating disorder therapy. I also know many of the women I work with have tried for a long time to be able to get better on their own only to be left feeling discouraged and hopeless. 

Practice patience with yourself 

A woman meditating and practicing patience. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy helps anxious women find peace by providing anxiety therapy, EMDR therapy, and eating disorder treatment in Utah.

I’m not claiming that eating disorder recovery is a fast and easy process. It’s neither of those things but it will be the best choice you’ve ever made. I’ve never met a person who fully recovered from their eating disorder that ever regretted doing it. It’s important to be patient with yourself and your progress and recognize you are doing the best you can.

Consider meeting with other eating disorder professionals 

Eating disorders are complicated mental health conditions. They impact you emotionally, mentally, and physically. Because of the physical component I always recommend considering seeing a medical provider for a physical (preferably one that knows exactly what to look for) to make sure your body is working properly. I also recommend seeing an eating disorder dietitian that can help educate you on proper nutrition from an intuitive eating approach. 

Have Hope

Maybe the most important aspect of eating disorder recovery is having hope. You can’t recover from your eating disorder without having hope it’s possible. Have hope that you won’t always feel the way you feel now. Have hope that there’s a better life out there for you where you don’t have to hate yoru body or feel anxious about eating. Have hope this is going to get better. 

Ready to start working with an eating disorder therapist in Utah?

Two pillows sitting on a couch. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides online eating disorder therapy, therapy for perfectionists, and body image therapy in Utah.

You don’t have to try and navigate eating disorder recovery on your own. You can improve your relationship with food and feel better about yourself. Eating Disorder therapy can help. This Utah Counseling Center has an eating disorder therapist specializing in eating disorder therapy. To begin counseling follow the steps below: 

  1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation 

  2. Meet with a therapist for eating disorders 

  3. Begin eating disorder recovery

Online Eating Disorder Therapy in Utah 

It can be hard to find the right therapist regardless of where you live but it’s even more difficult to find a therapist that specializes in treating eating disorders. Sadly, there are many parts of Utah that don’t have a therapist with eating disorder training available in the city they live in. This is why I provide online therapy in Utah. Online eating disorder therapy is just as effective as in-person therapy without having to travel. 

Online counseling means I work with people all throughout Utah. I work with clients in Logan, Salt Lake City, Heber City, Provo, St. George, Cedar City, and more. I find that my clients love online eating disorder therapy, and think you will too.

Other Mental Health Services Provided by Maple Canyon Therapy 

Eating disorder therapy isn’t the only therapy provided at this Utah Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include anxiety therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, EMDR therapy, birth trauma therapy, counseling for college students, and body image therapy. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation to see how I can help. 

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt LCSW. This represents how Maple Canyon Therapy provides therapy for dating anxiety, EMDR for binge eating, and therapy for birth trauma in Utah.

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and eating disorder therapist at Maple Canyon Therapy in Utah. Ashlee has been treating eating disorders since she was a graduate student at Utah State University where she graduated with a master's in social work. She began working with women with eating disorders as a graduate student therapist at USU Counseling and Psychological Services. Ashlee values helping women improve their relationships with their food and their body image long-term through practicing self-compassion. Ashlee loves being an eating disorder therapist and seeing women heal. When she’s not doing therapy, she enjoys reading and finding new books at the Spanish Fork City Library. 

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